Six months ago, I had my feet firmly planted in the written word. I was writing every day and attending writing workshops. I even formed a critique group with some local writers to boost my writing game. My daily routine consisted of journaling, editing manuscripts, outlining story concepts, reading books on writing, researching material for my own work, and a healthy dose of recreational reading. I had set some ambitious goals for 2020 where my writing was concerned and up until about March, I was tracking well with them.
We all know what happened in March: A GLOBAL PANDEMIC. Who could have seen that coming? At first, it wasn’t anything I needed to worry about. I was a full-time writer after all. My daily routine was one of solitude, so all it really meant was that my husband and I would get more take out as opposed to dining out.
After about a week of lockdown, I had trouble falling asleep one night and my mind did what it usually does: it occupied itself with a ridiculous number of things that would continue to keep me awake rather than help me fall asleep. At this point, it was becoming clear we would be in this lockdown status for at least a few weeks and my mind wandered over to my church community. I had been planning a worship service for our youth for Easter Sunday, so worship had been on my mind. Then I began to think about how my church might worship if we couldn’t meet in person.
What if there was something I could do while we waited for a safe return to church? It quickly dawned on me what I needed to do. I threw off the covers and went to my computer and sent an email to my pastor. I don’t know why the Holy Spirit insisted I do that instead of waiting until morning but I’ve long since learned to just go with Him.
Many years ago, I fancied myself a filmmaker. I was good at it but making movies didn’t pay the bills and my circle of filmmaking friends began to disburse, myself included. I kept a camera and some other gear, but it had been years since I’d used any of it for regular work. I figured the pandemic would be a great opportunity to dust it all off and make a few videos for my church while we were in this temporary status…
Temporary, such a deceptive word.
Here we are in July; not weeks but months later with many more months on the horizon. I’m still writing every day though only in my journal. I’m not outlining stories or editing manuscripts; I’m editing videos and mixing music. My days of solitude have been traded in for production shoots and recording sessions. My church sanctuary has been turned into a sound stage where I film segments for online worship. I’m learning the ins and outs of audio engineering so I can record our worship band. I’ve had to relearn aspects of video production as tools and technology have come a long way since my days of making movies.
At first, I struggled. I felt guilty for working so hard on my writing only to abandon it so quickly to answer the call for video ministry. But my pastor sister reminded me that we all have seasons in our lives. More than a decade ago, I was in a filmmaking season which prepared me for the work I am doing today. My writing isn’t going anywhere. In fact, I’ve been writing since about the sixth grade and throughout all the many seasons in my life, I have returned to it numerous times as I’m sure I will again.
I hate wearing face masks, I’m saddened that museums and libraries remain closed, I’m frustrated that I can’t play boardgames with my friends. This pandemic has thrown a wrench in everyone’s plans, so I am no different.
And yet..
I have rediscovered my love of video production. I have been reminded how simple, little elements of picture and sound can be combined to create beautiful and meaningful works of art. I have seen the transformative power worship can bring to a faith community in forced isolation. It occurred to me I was prepared for this time, this season in my life. God made sure I would know what to do when this time came, and I am grateful to have a purpose when so many are lost. I am looking forward to the day when I can return to my writing solitude but until then, I am choosing to find the joy in this most unusual of seasons.
End Transmission.
How has it been two months since my last blog post? I have had a very busy summer this year but not nearly as busy as the summer of 2008. Ten years ago while attending Shoreline Community College I had the privilege of writing and directing a feature film. Nothing about that project was easy and almost nothing went according to plan.
Like I said, almost nothing went according to plan. When working with a collection of student volunteers, I learned very quickly that not everyone who makes a commitment, sticks with it. I had engaging phone calls and meetings with people who seemed genuinely excited to work on the film and then not show up, not return calls, leaving me totally in the lurch. There were several points during that summer I wanted to quit. I was investing so much of my time and my own money (credit actually, I didn’t have any actual money at the time) and often I felt so alone. But I wasn’t alone. While some people may have bailed on me, I had a few dedicated cast and crew members who stood by me until the end of production. It was a relief when it was finally “in the can” and several months later we actually reassembled to film some additional scenes (those went way better!).
Once everything was shot, I went to work cutting the film and composing the effect shots. Nothing about post production went according to plan either! The problem with shooting on a new format is that software and codecs hadn’t caught up to it. My computer system was relatively new at the time and it was severely under powered for the 4K footage I was asking it to process. When I would compose an effects shot, I literally had to export the scene in tiny sections because any more than a few seconds and my machine crashed!
Time passed and life happened. My frustrations with the project made it difficult to complete and eventually my bank account required me to take a job out of state. Eventually I was able to upgrade my computer and Adobe was able to finally recognize native red footage. After a few years I went back to the film and was able to re-render entire scenes of effect shots and recompose the film.
My lead cast member asked me about the film the other day and I figured now was as good a time as any to put it out there. It’s not perfect and I can’t watch the film without seeing all the mistakes and shortcuts that were made to get it done. Still though, for a student film in 2008 made on less than a shoestring budget, I think it holds up pretty well.